02.09.02
| 12:29 p.m.
Smoking
I just smoked the last cigarette in my pack and I am seriously considering not buying more. Whenever I smoke, I feel sick to my stomach, I get a headache and it tastes terrible. I have lost the pleasure of smoking. I used to love it (for some reason). I used to think about smoking a cigarette after a good meal, after blazingly hot sex, and in the car on even the shortist of road trips. But now... I loathe smoking. I hate the smell... I hate the way my house smells mostly. Have you ever smoked a cigarette with a cold or the flu? Know how bad it tastes and makes you feel? That's how I feel all the time. And I smoke menthols even! Most people switch to menthols for the durations of their colds... they taste better, I guess. But there are no other cigarettes out there that I like, and I am quickly starting to hate mine!
And my daughter asked me to quit... such a guilt trip. "Mommy, I want you to stop smoking so you can live a long long time with me. I love you." How can I not quit after that? I would be "Worst-Parent-of-the-Year" if I didn't!
So, cold turkey? Gum? The Patch? Anyone have any ideas? As stupid as it sounds, I don't really know where to begin. Cigarettes have been part of my life for 11 years! I have smoked between 1-2 packs a day for 11 years. God what I wouldn't give to have all that money handed back to me! Do you think more people would quit if it worked that way? The tobacco companies could keep track of your spending and hold your money and collect interest off of it. Once you quit, they hand all your money back to you- minus interest, of course. Sure they wouldn't make as much money, but there are plenty of people who will never quit, or will die trying.
Just a silly thought!
